Fierce

I'm competitive. I know that. And I don't lose well either, especially when it comes to boys. And honestly, I'm finding it hard to see how Cole wants Katie over me. Yes I'm that competitive!. GET OVER IT. I won't.

But between that happening and then me "loosing" to all those other girls with the guys that like to fuck me over its like wow you've GOT to be kidding me. The only guys who are nice are the unattractive ones and even Ricky I managed to fuck up.

Girls aren't much better either. You'd think that my competitiveness would be in front of a lack of self esteem/ self confidence. But its more like I get over confident and then this is a reminder that I need to chill the fuck out. But its not that easy. Also why does Gen think its okay to say everything's fine when she blatantly won't even look at me or ANYTHING. COOL. I thought we were past the whole saying "it's fine" even though its not phase. Please, leave that shit in high school.

WHY CAN'T PEOPLE JUST SAY SHIT STRAIGHT UP. ITS NOT THAT HARD. don't tell me you're fucking "hanging out" when its a date. I fucking slept with him last week. LESS THAN A WEEK AGO. WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THATS OKAY!? WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT. UGH.