until someone ruins it with feelings. I know sometimes I block mine unreasonably but they always end up coming out and I don't even think I have feelings when it comes to this other than it all just keeps relating back to how I judge myself about having herpes. Which granted, wouldn't be the reason this would end with corey it would be because I'm a very involved person who talks a lot and feels a lot and yes when I have a new friend I like to get to know them. And yes when I'm drunk I text people and send stupid drunkface pictures. But from the random shit that he had been telling me and how he never let a conversation die before... it's annoying for me to be on the end of waiting for a response now. I mean he had no friends before he met me and the reality is I'm not even going to see him when I'm working. And by the time I do over vacation week... he'll have more friends than me. But its whatever. I just hate that I feel like a stepping stone for so many people all the time. Like yes I like to be a friend and blah blah blah but I want a friend in return and I hate when people feel they can't tell me shit.
Or when people start saying shit because they feel insecure. ugh. I really liked how corey and I interacted because it was so casual and like fun. and somewhere along the line I let my feelings come into play and fucked that shit up slightly. Who knows. The sex is good and like really good sooo I'm hopeful.... but my curse of 3 is at its breaking point. So who knows.
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